Heh...

Written one year ago, today (yes, at that time it was also technically the 15th):

Well, maybe one of these days there might actually be a glimmer of hope for me in this dismal little life... but it will probably only be when I'm finally able to stop thinking about you.

It's not as though it'd be for any positive reason, right?

Knowing what I was thinking at the time, and comparing it to the current state of affairs, I find it pretty ironic that I once wrote such musings about a person who has since brought so many good things to my life. Thank you for everything... you know who you are. ^_-

Oh yeah

I forgot to mention, dinner was tasty. We swung by the Olive Garden, which of course, was packed, and the wait was 1 1/2 hours. So we said scr00 that and went to Tino's where the wait was only 15 or 20 minutes. Aww yea! The dinner was very good, and they made some of the best Cheese Bread I have ever had. The spices made all the difference! That place has such a nice, homey atmosphere too... A+.

Bedtime now, methinks. I have an early day tomorrow. Damnit! Stupid Thursday. :p

BLEH!

I HATE MORNINGS!!

Haven't said it in a while, so I thought I'd re-emphasize the point. ^_-

Weeeellll now

Tools 2 was kind of worth getting up for today. Since we're doing that digital video project, they showed us some clips from Natural Born Killers, as well this old Film-Noir called Touch of Evil. There were some very cool stylistic things in both movies. :D

Tools 1 was a snooze. Pagemaker, Yee-haw. :p I *only* used that for the entirety of my senior year in high school. I think I can figure out pretty much everything I need on my own, AS usual.

I need to find a fork so I can eat my lunch! I forgot to bring one today. I must have my food! ;_;

(no subject)

I got a fork from Janet downstairs. HOORAY! I now have lunch in my belly. :D That cheese bread even tastes good re-heated. Awww yea. :D Got a good 2 hours until choir. I wanna go NOW. I'm bored. :p

Somewhat-Brutal Honesty Hour, #3

I'm an incredible, honest-to-god lesbian! (yeah, except for the lesbian part :p)

It's truly awesome to have even a small handful of people that you're really close to and that you'd trust with anything. Why? Because you end up finding out a whole bunch of fun, random little facts about other people. It's the kind of thing that a hoarder of secrets such as myself thrives on. I like watching and gathering info about people, trying to put together the puzzle that is a particular person, and try to figure out what makes them tick. It's an interesting challenge that I give myself sometimes.

Of course, this little fetish of mine sometimes leads to learning a few people's opinions of ME, which can get a little weird. So far I haven't heard anything horrid, but it's kind of unnerving...

...especially when you find out that someone you previously associated with in passing thought you were hot, but didn't ask you out because "they thought you were a lesbian."

. . .

Yeah, apparently a guy I used to work with said exactly that. He thought I was cute, and seemed cool, and he would have asked me out, but he thought I was a lesbian, hands down. He actually said "oh, so you turned one, eh?" to someone I dated. He honestly thought, or at least seemed to think, that I dated women exclusively.

I would just like to ask: WHAT THE FUCK?

Perhaps I should reiterate this point right off the bat: I LIKE MALES. I'm 100% totally straight. I'm not even bisexual, or bi-curious. Nothing makes me hotter than a good ol' Y chromosome, baby.

And it's not as though I haven't *thought* about the possibility either, because I figure just about everyone who's not a complete homophobe has probably considered it at some point in their lives. The difference is that, for me, I invariably up going "ew ew ew ew ew" at the end of any train of thought on that particular track.

So apparently, there's some part of my behaviour that makes at least some guys think "wow, too bad, that one's a lesbian." And I'll give you this point: I am certainly not the most feminine of females. My gender test result certainly seems indicative of that. But I'm sure there are homosexual women out there who would fervently insist that masculinity (or the lack thereof) has no real connection with lesbianism.

Perhaps it's aggressiveness? But that can't be it, because I tend to be pretty non-aggressive and focused on compromise. Maybe it was just because I was so friggin' surly from working early? Is it because I'm not built like a twelve-year-old boy like most modern women are expected to be?

What the hell is it? :p Is this just an isolated incident from somebody who was completely without a clue, or is there something to it?

Pssh, I dunno. Maybe it's the combat boots.

Sheer annoyance.

I sat there and did dishes. We have SO MANY DISHES. I washed and washed until the hot water ran out, and then there were STILL dishes left. I'm highly annoyed by this. Our house is still messy, and now I'm all tired and stuff.

Anyhow, it looks like we're going to go buy and make dinner, despite the remaining dishes. We have enough to make dinner with. And maybe after that I can con somebody *else* into cleaning up some part of the freakin' house. x_x

Relief.

Had a good dinner. The kitchen is messy AGAIN though. I'm never gonna be able to catch up with it. ;_;

Survivor was nice. :D I swear, at least half the enjoyment I get out of watching that show comes from yelling at the TV about how much certain people suck or kick ass. LMAO! I'm glad to see Mitchell gone, because he was definitely weak, and kind of a whiner to boot, but he did win points in the end for admitting his physical weaknesses. And it's also good because that whittles down the Jerri Club. Jerri must die! >:D

I have lots of reading to catch up on for stinky Art History. Zach and James are out in the front room doing stuff though, and that's where I usually park whenever I want to get some serious reading done. I'm not sure if I'll get anything done tonight...