"...did you learn the art of comforting others from Ike Turner?"

[batskeets]

So, I got a compliment on my appearance earlier today, from some random guy on the street. This probably doesn't sound like a bad thing, in and of itself, but in this case, the compliment came from an unkempt, vaguely creepy homeless guy.

Now, I'll be the first to tell you that, comparatively, I've led a pretty sheltered life. But, there are certain types of homeless-looking people that you have to make a distinction about. First, there are the kindly homeless people, who seem fairly jovial in spite of being down on their luck, and who might be a little nutty, but are generally harmless. Secondly, there are the white-trash-looking people who look homeless, but who are probably not actually homeless at all--just *very* low-income, unkempt, and blue collar, and they give off a certain air that makes them seem shifty, seedy, and perhaps even a bit lecherous.

(Note: this is not to say that all low-income folk seem shifty and lecherous, because that's just *not* true--I'm mainly just trying to emphasize the unnerving shifty vibe I got from this guy)

The people in the first group don't bother me at all, which I suppose is a good thing, because there are quite a few of that sort around Eugene. They are generally friendly and sometimes have interesting stories, and I might even spot them a buck or a taco or something, if I happen to have the scratch.

The people in the second group, however, set me on edge, and if I cross paths with one on the street, I generally just want to keep going on my merry way, and get away from them as soon as possible. This dude was firmly in the second group.

So, let's review:
(+) I got a compliment completely at random, from a stranger on the street, which is kind of neat, in itself.
(-) The person doing the complimenting was in the seedy/creepy second group of homeless-looking people, who generally make me want to run the hell away, so finding a way to excuse myself quickly without being rude was more than a little trying.
(-) I hadn't had breakfast yet, so I just wanted to go and get my damned meal before my stomach ate itself. Any sort of idle chit-chat with me when I'm in this state is not a great idea.
(-) I have no idea how to take a compliment, even from a non-threatening person, so I tend to get incredibly flustered by this sort of thing as a general rule.
(-) After I politely said thank you and tried to continue on my way, dude insisted on stopping me again to say that he was serious about the compliment, which, of course, increased the feeling of wanting to run away rightnowrightnow.

So, yeah, I guess it's nice to know that I'm looking good, and everything. Just, glah, sometimes strangers really freak me out. Especially scabby, weathered-looking, middle-aged guys who look like they might have been in a bar fight recently.

Sigh. Why can't I ever get a compliment from a nice, upstanding, clean-smelling, Johnny Depp lookalike? ;pppp Or, you know, ANYONE who seems even remotely desirable, or slightly non-threatening?

I'm not sure that a lot of people really know how to give a compliment, nowadays. I imagine that a lot of people who give compliments aren't in the habit of doing so without some kind of ulterior motive. Giving a compliment to a stranger, just for the hell of it? That doesn't seem to happen much, anymore.

Anyway, enough of my yammering. I'm off!

Comments

[helloandie.livejournal.com]

you sure gotta perty mouth. wanna breed?

[xplo.livejournal.com]

When you say this, you need to emphasize the word "breed", and follow it up with a leering grin that makes your yellowed eyes bug out slightly.



I generally don't compliment women. This is because I suspect the women most likely to garner compliments need to have their egos deflated, not inflated, and especially because guys are probably extra-nice to them all the time anyway, so the universal balance dictates that they have it too good and need to suffer more.

(Yes, yes, I know. Issues like a newsstand.)

[skeets.livejournal.com]

I generally don't compliment women. This is because I suspect the women most likely to garner compliments need to have their egos deflated, not inflated

LOL! I was thinking after writing the post about why *I* don't compliment people more often, and that was exactly the reason I came up with. If there's one thing that I can't stand, it's an overinflated ego. :p

[a-wags.livejournal.com]

my sister always gets compliments from the shadiest of all men, and I just cant figure out why

[threeleet.livejournal.com]

I imagine that a lot of people who give compliments aren't in the habit of doing so without some kind of ulterior motive.

Main reason I never compliment strangers is exactly that- suspicion of having an ulterior motive. Either I'm a psycho stalker, or just trying to get in their pants. And/or I wind up sounding like a total sleazebag. Not sure if I can speak for most guys, but all the publicity & policies about sexual harrassment have made it very difficult to say anything complimentary to anyone I'm not either already dating or on really good terms with, lest it be taken "offensively."

[alleycatsphinx.livejournal.com]

I like complementing people.

A good complement is discerning something about someone that they really like about themselves (ie, if you can tell someone is clearly wearing their favorite sweater, then say nice sweater), and then giving it in a way that can have no suspicious motive.

It's much easier said than done, so one must be well practiced. Especially to people who aren't in the buisness of recving complements.

[(Anonymous)]

Well lord knows I'm neither Deppesque or even remotely desirable... but I can never ever compliment you enough. You are a beautiful and brilliant person, and your beauty is exceeded only by your brilliance. So says Cortan.

[skeets.livejournal.com]

Heh, you don't even fall remotely near the same group as CreepyDude, because A) you effing kick ass and are awesome, and B) you already know me. People are far more likely to give compliments to people they know than to total strangers. :)

But I appreciate it!! You're my favorite :D