Angst schmangst

[batskeets]

<rant>
You know, there's a reason why I don't want to move back in with my parents. Because the minute I do, somebody is going to be riding my ass constantly about what I should and shouldn't be doing, and I *hate* that. I'm going to make my own decisions, and I don't want unsolicited advice.

And, I *certainly* don't need to keep answering the phone every single day, and getting the same treatment over a telephone wire! Is it any wonder that me and the guys have taken to screening our phone calls? For the love of God, I'd just like to be left to my own devices for a week or two. Even a few consecutive days would be a blessing, at this point.

Nobody seems to understand that when they pressure me, when they question all my actions, it only eats away at what little motivation I already have. It only makes me more resolute about my current path, and it makes me more resistant to change.

I am not as resistant to change as some folks might think. But, if I'm going to make a major change, I will make the decision on my own, and not because someone else thinks I should. I'm old enough to make my own choices, without having them questioned every step of the way.

There are certain types of misery that I am prepared for, but I am NOT going to do something that isn't right for me.

And I also CAN NOT control what other people do with their lives.

God. I think that retaining my own residence may be the biggest motivator I have going for me. I cannot return to such a critical environment. I've come to expect that from jobs and from my prior education, but I don't need it in every aspect of my life. That's not how people are supposed to live.
</rant>

Comments

[pyrobaby.livejournal.com]

Nobody seems to understand that when they pressure me, when they question all my actions, it only eats away at what little motivation I already have. It only makes me more resolute about my current path, and it makes me more resistant to change. If I'm going to change, I'm going to make the decision on my own, and not because someone else thinks I should.

Oh god, I totally feel you on that. I mean, when people nag and pressure me that hard, it makes me want to do the exact OPPOSITE just because it pisses me off so much. If I ask for advice, then please, give it. Otherwise shut the fuck UP and let me live my damn life! I'm insecure enough as it is without people badgering me. >_<

Babe, you are FAR from a moron, and more than capable of making your own decisions. Your family may not have figured that out yet, but the hell with 'em. Good luck. *hug*

[addwag.livejournal.com]

you know, I moved into my parents about a year ago for 6 months and it was terrible! its like living in high school again; I felt guilty for sleeping in, I got crap for spending my weekends in bed watching tv.. it was hell.. never again

[skeets.livejournal.com]

Eh, well, my dad seems to get it, at least--he doesn't give out advice to me very often, these days, so I realize that something *must* be a big deal, if he feels compelled to mention it. It has a far greater impact on my decision-making processes, that's for sure.

But then there's my ma, who keeps asking every day or two and yammering on and on and saying basically the same thing each time until OH MY GOD I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE.

These decisions take TIME.

[gmendel.livejournal.com]

If it's any validation, it took me TWO FRIGGIN YEARS after I graduated to make a decision about what I wanted to do with my life and get started doing it!

Nobody gave me a hard time or tried to push me into doing anything. I just tried a few different kinds of jobs and gave myself some time to think.

Since I did have plenty of time to think about it, I'm able to actually be excited about what I'm doing, rather than resent it and wonder about what else I could have done if I'd only given it a chance.

[juuzingekido.livejournal.com]

You shouldn't move back in with your parents, because obviously such an atmosphere would stunt your growth as a person. Don't let your mom's opinion drag you down, many people deal with moms just like that. You will know what to do with in time. I have faith.

[skeets.livejournal.com]

Weeellll, if I don't find a job, then I may not have much of a choice in the matter. But I'm certainly trying to avoid it.

I think I've just been out on my own for too long to realistically live by someone else's rules again, you know?

Re: These decisions take TIME.

[skeets.livejournal.com]

Heh, well, I already know what I want to do--it's just a matter of finding someone who will pay me to do it! :)

I would definitely like to know how you supported yourself while trying on different jobs, though, because I don't necessarily expect to find a job in my field right away. I'm totally willing to take a random job now, in order to keep the bills paid.

Re: These decisions take TIME.

[gmendel.livejournal.com]

My girlfriend and I did a lot of temp work, more with Adecco in Tigard and Portland than any other agency. Some agencies will try to place you in really crappy jobs, it helps to try to figure out which ones get the higher-paying contracts.

Sometimes I got a part-time job that paid fairly highly per hour, that left me time to work on my own freelance projects (not that those ever earned me a dime). Those part-time jobs tended to be rather temporary, though.

I found temp agencies to be a nice way to get work fast. You just need to sign up for lots of agencies and harass them by phone at least every other morning (preferably every morning) to make sure they don't forget about you. Also good to keep a cell phone handy, and a change of clothes ready to go in case you need to rush out to an interview or assignment.

[lostsatellite.livejournal.com]

I hear your frustration about the possibility of living with your parents...I wish I had an alternative, but financially I just don't...and they're nice enough to not kick me out onto the streets and support me in a number of different ways...hopefully I'll actually save up some money and move out like I should be doing...

so, if you end up living with them, it would certainly be annoying and difficult, but you adjust the best you can...and realize that it's only temporary...

oh yeah, I feel like I could have totally written this myself:

Nobody seems to understand that when they pressure me, when they question all my actions, it only eats away at what little motivation I already have. It only makes me more resolute about my current path, and it makes me more resistant to change.

that seems to sum up the past twenty-six years of my relationship with my parents...