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Motivation is a bitch
Jan. 25th, 2008 11:21 amSo, things have been going pretty well. I've actually been in a decent mood at The Job, and I'm not hating it quite so much. My social efforts have gone better than I'd hoped, both with my peer group and with workpeople. I'm full of ideas for rad photos. I'm working on several things that can help the business, and I'm feeling pretty darned focused.
BUT, there's one area where I've completely lost motivation: diet and training.
Be warned: lots of complaining to follow.
I was doing pretty great on the two-week Hell Phase of SBD. I wound up losing about eight pounds, and I was feeling good about things on Monday, when the two-week period ended.
Thing is, my body has felt super-weak, and I can't seem to do the things I can normally do well, in yoga and at wushu. Yeah, I know, "but you ran 4.6 miles less than two weeks ago!" Thing is, that run pretty much wrecked me for an entire week afterwards, and all my workouts have completely sucked since then.
And, I got to start reincorporating fruits and high-fiber grain stuff on Monday. I've been more careful about adding things back in, but so far, I seem to be steadily regaining about half a pound each day. That makes NO FREAKING SENSE. The last time I did this diet, I didn't regain anything! The weight loss slowed, sure, but there was no regain.
And, of course, even with the reintroduction of carbs into my diet, my body still feels dead, so I can't even blame the weakness on a lack of carbs. Last time around, I was back to normal performance levels in a couple days, but right now, I can feel the tiredness in my legs today, just walking around the bloody office. And I didn't even work out yesterday!
When I was visiting my parents over the holidays, they'd just gotten one of those expensive Tanita scales that measures your body fat composition and a bunch of other stuff. I plugged in my info, stepped on, and it told me I had the metabolism of a 38 year-old. A 38 YEAR-OLD! I'm freaking 27 years old! I work out regularly, and I eat better than just about everyone I know! WTF!?
So, yeah. I seriously need a shot in the arm of motivation. I know that it has only been a few days, and my weight could start dropping again, but I'm frustrated as hell, and I feel so little desire to train. I seem to be getting worse instead of improving, and my body just hurts more and more, and it's been that way since before the stupid diet.
I'm seriously starting to wonder if I should even continue to compete. I still want to keep doing wushu for fun, but I don't know if I'll ever have what it takes to compete at an advanced level. I want to so badly, but my body doesn't seem up to the task...
I think I'm just rambling and feeling sorry for myself, but, ARGH. Any words of wisdom or encouragement would be appreciated.
BUT, there's one area where I've completely lost motivation: diet and training.
Be warned: lots of complaining to follow.
I was doing pretty great on the two-week Hell Phase of SBD. I wound up losing about eight pounds, and I was feeling good about things on Monday, when the two-week period ended.
Thing is, my body has felt super-weak, and I can't seem to do the things I can normally do well, in yoga and at wushu. Yeah, I know, "but you ran 4.6 miles less than two weeks ago!" Thing is, that run pretty much wrecked me for an entire week afterwards, and all my workouts have completely sucked since then.
And, I got to start reincorporating fruits and high-fiber grain stuff on Monday. I've been more careful about adding things back in, but so far, I seem to be steadily regaining about half a pound each day. That makes NO FREAKING SENSE. The last time I did this diet, I didn't regain anything! The weight loss slowed, sure, but there was no regain.
And, of course, even with the reintroduction of carbs into my diet, my body still feels dead, so I can't even blame the weakness on a lack of carbs. Last time around, I was back to normal performance levels in a couple days, but right now, I can feel the tiredness in my legs today, just walking around the bloody office. And I didn't even work out yesterday!
When I was visiting my parents over the holidays, they'd just gotten one of those expensive Tanita scales that measures your body fat composition and a bunch of other stuff. I plugged in my info, stepped on, and it told me I had the metabolism of a 38 year-old. A 38 YEAR-OLD! I'm freaking 27 years old! I work out regularly, and I eat better than just about everyone I know! WTF!?
So, yeah. I seriously need a shot in the arm of motivation. I know that it has only been a few days, and my weight could start dropping again, but I'm frustrated as hell, and I feel so little desire to train. I seem to be getting worse instead of improving, and my body just hurts more and more, and it's been that way since before the stupid diet.
I'm seriously starting to wonder if I should even continue to compete. I still want to keep doing wushu for fun, but I don't know if I'll ever have what it takes to compete at an advanced level. I want to so badly, but my body doesn't seem up to the task...
I think I'm just rambling and feeling sorry for myself, but, ARGH. Any words of wisdom or encouragement would be appreciated.
