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batskeetsI read a post by ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
starkodama this morning, about a tournament she'd been stressing out about, and that she ultimately decided to drop. Considering the circumstances, I actually think it was the best decision she could've made, and if you read the post, you'd probably agree.
Sure, people want to challenge themselves. Challenges are pretty much a necessary part of life; if nothing ever turned out in a way that you didn't expect, it'd be pretty boring, na? Learning to deal with challenges when they come up is a skill that any non-idiot will need, and actually *pursuing* challenges is, IMO, a sign of a well-developed and well-rounded person.
The thing most folks forget? There's also such thing as challenging yourself *too* much. There are some things that can't be accomplished within the context of your life, or anyone else's life, and if you try to do those things, you're probably going to break yourself, whether it be physically or emotionally.
Setting yourself up to fail, and rendering your own life into a shambles in the name of "challenging yourself"? That kind of defeats the purpose. Challenging yourself is about improving and enriching your life, and it's not smart to improve one aspect of your life by crushing all the other aspects. If you're completely miserable and freaked out about a goal, it might be because some part of you knows that you've taken on something that's too big.
A couple of weeks ago, I found myself in the latter category. I'd registered for four events (changquan, nanquan, staff, and broadsword) at Berkeley, and I was determined to do them all. Of course, this meant that I had to finish learning broadsword, learn staff, modify/choreograph changquan, perfect nanquan, *AND* still serve as coach, all in the span of less than 2 months. That was a tall order, and I knew it, but I took it on anyway.
One of those things fell through the cracks, though: I barely practiced nanquan all year, and when I ran through the form a week before Berkeley, I blanked out in the middle of it. A week later, when I basically screwed the pooch on my changquan set at the tournament, I started thinking about competing in nanquan after that, and remembered blanking out only a week before... and then my body felt even weaker from nerves, and since I was already feeling demoralized, I really panicked over it.
I started talking about dropping my nanquan event, and got a lot of lukewarm responses. The whole team seems to love that I do nanquan, so I got a lot of sighing, and, "OMG, but you can beat those people!" and, "Do what you want, I guess." I started feeling like a let-down, until Cassie said, "Do what makes you happy." And, after thinking about it for another half-hour or so, I decided to drop the event.
Some folks were disappointed, sure. But you know? The huge swell of relief that I felt after dropping that event was more than worth giving up some crappy 3rd place medal, and that's assuming I'd have even gotten one. I was hopping around, relaxed and smiling, and joking with people before my weapons events, and I don't think I've *ever* felt that way before at a competition. I actually felt the martial arts spirit and fire they always talk about, instead of just feeling like some uncoordinated fat kid.
It's no good to shy away from challenges constantly, but every once in a while, if you know you tried your best, you have to give yourself a break, let it go, and try it again when you're more prepared. In everything you do, remember why you're there, try to have some fun, and yeah, work hard at things, but don't kill yourself over them. We all work better and perform better when we're happy! :D
(and yes, I am quite determined to own face at nanquan at my next competition. BEWARE :O)
starkodama this morning, about a tournament she'd been stressing out about, and that she ultimately decided to drop. Considering the circumstances, I actually think it was the best decision she could've made, and if you read the post, you'd probably agree.Sure, people want to challenge themselves. Challenges are pretty much a necessary part of life; if nothing ever turned out in a way that you didn't expect, it'd be pretty boring, na? Learning to deal with challenges when they come up is a skill that any non-idiot will need, and actually *pursuing* challenges is, IMO, a sign of a well-developed and well-rounded person.
The thing most folks forget? There's also such thing as challenging yourself *too* much. There are some things that can't be accomplished within the context of your life, or anyone else's life, and if you try to do those things, you're probably going to break yourself, whether it be physically or emotionally.
Setting yourself up to fail, and rendering your own life into a shambles in the name of "challenging yourself"? That kind of defeats the purpose. Challenging yourself is about improving and enriching your life, and it's not smart to improve one aspect of your life by crushing all the other aspects. If you're completely miserable and freaked out about a goal, it might be because some part of you knows that you've taken on something that's too big.
A couple of weeks ago, I found myself in the latter category. I'd registered for four events (changquan, nanquan, staff, and broadsword) at Berkeley, and I was determined to do them all. Of course, this meant that I had to finish learning broadsword, learn staff, modify/choreograph changquan, perfect nanquan, *AND* still serve as coach, all in the span of less than 2 months. That was a tall order, and I knew it, but I took it on anyway.
One of those things fell through the cracks, though: I barely practiced nanquan all year, and when I ran through the form a week before Berkeley, I blanked out in the middle of it. A week later, when I basically screwed the pooch on my changquan set at the tournament, I started thinking about competing in nanquan after that, and remembered blanking out only a week before... and then my body felt even weaker from nerves, and since I was already feeling demoralized, I really panicked over it.
I started talking about dropping my nanquan event, and got a lot of lukewarm responses. The whole team seems to love that I do nanquan, so I got a lot of sighing, and, "OMG, but you can beat those people!" and, "Do what you want, I guess." I started feeling like a let-down, until Cassie said, "Do what makes you happy." And, after thinking about it for another half-hour or so, I decided to drop the event.
Some folks were disappointed, sure. But you know? The huge swell of relief that I felt after dropping that event was more than worth giving up some crappy 3rd place medal, and that's assuming I'd have even gotten one. I was hopping around, relaxed and smiling, and joking with people before my weapons events, and I don't think I've *ever* felt that way before at a competition. I actually felt the martial arts spirit and fire they always talk about, instead of just feeling like some uncoordinated fat kid.
It's no good to shy away from challenges constantly, but every once in a while, if you know you tried your best, you have to give yourself a break, let it go, and try it again when you're more prepared. In everything you do, remember why you're there, try to have some fun, and yeah, work hard at things, but don't kill yourself over them. We all work better and perform better when we're happy! :D
(and yes, I am quite determined to own face at nanquan at my next competition. BEWARE :O)
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no subject
Date: 2007-04-05 08:56 pm (UTC)