Jul. 1st, 2015

Sometimes, you have moments when you know you'd be brilliant at something, but the words to convince everyone else of that simply won't come.

I think I have those moments more often than not. I'm too honest, too humble, too self-aware, and too grounded. I'm turned off by people with braggadocio and overinflated egos, and god forbid I should ever give the impression that I *am* one of those people. I've never enjoyed hard-selling things, and selling myself comes even less naturally.

I know I *am* capable of being that person who knows the right answers, makes the amusing quips, and speaks with confidence. What I haven't figured out is how to replicate that. And, part of it is certainly chemistry--I have enough of an instinct about people to know when I will or won't fit in with them. But, I also know that I *can* adapt and get along with a goodly variety of people... once I've had some time to figure out how they tick, anyway.

Still, it'd be nice if my brain would cooperate when I need it to, instead of being a stream of 10000+ racing thoughts that I can't quite grab onto.

Oh well. That possible dream may have escaped today, but the status quo isn't desperate. There could be a future here, too.

Onto the next thing, whatever it is.

March 2017

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